What is up my peeps!  Welcome to the first: The week in singles.

We’ve got A LOT of ground to cover this week from Duffy’s latest snooze-fest of a single to the return of the utterly creepy Grace Jones, there is quite a bit going on right now in the Pop world.

Duffy-"Stepping Stone"

After listening to the fourth single from Duffy’s debut album one question comes to mind: What the hell were here managers thinking when they decided to release this? I really thought Duffy’s “Mercy” was one of the catchiest songs of the year, the follow up “Warwick Avenue” was kind of annoying and the video of Duffy looking like the a crying premenstrual raccoon was just NOT attractive.

Now with this song, she just sounds boring. It’s quite a pretty song but that’s about it. I think Duffy is trying to go down the “I’m a serious artist so I have to release serious songs” route, which is just ridiculous because you can still be a serious artist AND release classic music, I mean just look at Nadia Oh, now THAT’S TALENT!

With the rumored release of the fifth single “Serious” things could get interesting again. But my question is why the hell just not release that instead of a song that screams “I’M AN ARTIST! RESPECT ME!”

My rating: 4/5 bitch slaps

Now on to the next single,

Solange- "Sandcastle Disco"

So, ever wondered how annoying Beyoncé could have been if she hadn’t become famous but was STILL trying to make it in the music biz? Well then I think you have found your answer with Solange’s latest offering “Sandcastle Disco” (Who the hell makes up this crap?)

I really think Solange isn’t as annoying as Beyoncé and in fact her voice a  certain “quality” about it that is quite appealing. But the song sounds like every other Amy, Duffy , Adele song out there. That kinda “throwback” sound that is ALREADY done. With the “doo-whops” and the “ooh-ooh-ooh” it’s just like ALRIGHT ALREADY! Poor Solange is being misguided to jump on the latest bandwagon of modern soul singers and is not bringing anything new to the table. But to seal this death trap of a release the video just speaks for itself. Note to Solange: if your video looks like a back drop for a Pampers, soup, gumball commercial…. there MUST be something wrong.

My rating: 5/5 bitchslaps

Nobody does it better..

Now nobody does Slut-pop quite like them, yes the Pussycat Dolls are back and the single “When I Grow Up” is FINALLY being released in the U.K, I have been playing this song on my ipod for over 2 months so it’s not like I’m very excited  and this is where I think this will hurt them when it comes to charting big on the U.K Singles Chart. The song itself is an instant strippa’ classic and that’s what I’m ALL about. It’s quite a different sound for the group. (and when I say “group” I really mean Nicole, cos seriously do the other dolls do anything else besides show up to the video shoots and dance rehearsals?) I really do hope that the album “Doll Domination” is more like this and less like “Stickwitchu”. Here’s hoping the next single “What’cha Think About That” is just as good.

My Rating: 5/5 Pantiless lapdances

Dreamy

I don’t know much about Avenue, but what I do know is that their new one “Last Goodbye” makes me wanna throw my hands up and dance like I don’t even give a fuck. These were the boys that didn’t make it through to the finals on the X-Factor (thank god for that) still I just think this song is quite amazing. The lyrics (which is a big FUCK you to a straying lover) are just so fitting for both gays and str-8s and in the words of the great Valerie Cherish “who can resist a disco beat?” I know they are a boy-band and they are pretty bland themselves but whoever wrote this song deserves  LUV U LONG TIME rimming.

The lead singer is just so dreamy now, isn’t he? When he sings “Do you like it like that” there’s quite  strong tingle in the crotch area… the video is every tween’s dream. Enjoy!

My rating: 5/5 Put It anywhere you want lapdances.

PICK OF THE WEEK:

Corporate Cannibal

And for the final single we have the long awaited return of the legendary Grace Jones. This woman can do no wrong in my book and she scares the bejeezus  outta me. Her new song “Corporate Cannibal” is a weird, strange, electro-rocker of a song. The song is so out there that it probably won’t be a smash radio hit, but there is something to be said about a woman who is 60 and makes more interesting musical choices than other singers around her age (ahem Madonna).

If this were a perfect world “Corporate Cannibal” would get huge airplay and sale millions but just because it won’t, doesn’t mean it’s not any good. Far from it. This song was taken from her up & coming “Hurricane” album which is set to be released October 27th. If this song is ANY indication of the album it should be her best. Keep it up abuela! If you really want to be asking yourself “What the fuck was that?” the rest of the day, here goes the video.

My Rating : 5/5 Voodoo Lapdances.

So my pets, it’s time for me to wrap it up, check back tomorrow where I’ll premire my Hot Shit of The Day. And yes takes me a WHOLE day to take a hot shit that’s why you’ll get it tomorrow! Bye! Myko-