After having my site down last week, I did not have the chance to do my weekly round up of singles and now I feel there is so much to listen to, that I am a bit overwhelmed.
As usual we have our stinkers which this week comes to us via Tinchy Stryder with his god-awful “Number 1″ and we have some stand-outs such as Lady Gaga’s new single “Paparazzi” so, lets get it on.
C-r-a-p.
How this song is the No.1 record in the U.K is just totally beyond me. I’m thinking yet again that Tinchy Stryder had a little chat with the Satan himself in order to get himself a hit record.
His single “Number 1″ is well……. just that but not because it is any good. Actually this has got to be one of the worst songs I have heard all year. (Not counting all the X-factor crap-ola) It’s just such a non-tune that it really makes me question what the hell people are hearing when they listen to this song. It sounds so amatuer-ish, the beat the production and even Trinchy’s stance.
The U.K’s answer to the Black Eyed Peas, N-dubz are featured on the song but one has to question what could such a non-group could contribute to such a non-song, well…… NOTHING really.
If people ask at the end of 2009 what was the years most undeserving no.1 song, Trinchy’s (sounds like a bad drag name) will take that title and it so deserves it.
My Rating: 5 monkey poops.
Welcome 2 England.
Looking like Nicola from Girls Aloud on the cover of her album “Abnormally Attracted To Sin”, Tori Amos is back with her single “Welcome To England”.
Now, Tori has been making music for decades and this song just proves why she is still in the music biz after all these years. The song has a haunting quality that all of Tori’s best work has. I like the fact that while this is a new song it does sound quite familiar. It’s classic Tori.
I wouldn’t expect to hear this song on the radio cos most of Tori’s recordings are a bit tool left field for mass public consumption but just because it’s on the radio DOES NOT mean it’s any good as Trinchy Styder’s song has already proven to us.
The video is very low-budget and I don’t know if it was intentionally done to look cheap or if they really had no more budget for Tori and her brand of funk. Anyway the vid could have been better.
My Rating: 3 voodoo monkeys.
Down-hill.
It’s kind of hard to keep track but if my calculations are right, “Hush,Hush” is the 5th single to be taken from PCD’s “Doll Domination” CD. Looking at the single cover, one thing clearly stands out: now it’s The Pussycat Dolls FEATURING Nicole Scherzinger. WTF? I will get into that on another post but right now let’s just stick to the song.
This song was a ballad and has been remixed by someone who lives with a cock in his mouth cos this remix is about as camp as pink boa. So camp in fact that it even has a verse og Gloria Gaynor’s “I Will Survive”. The sad thing about all of this is that, it just makes the song worse. I don’t like PCD ballads cos they should just stick to slut-pop but this version half ballad half dance is just one BIG MESS! I think that with this release we can officially say that the Dolls have lost their path on the road to finding their inner-skank. I predict that we will hear break-up news soon and judging by the quality of music they have released maybe that’s not such a bad idea.
My Rating; 4 strippa’s sitting this one out.
Single Of The Week:
"Paparazzi"
Lady Gaga is really making it difficult for me to like her. I LOVE her music and think that it truly is something fresh and exciting. Her new single “Paparazzi” is one of the best songs off of her album “The Fame” and I’m excited that it is getting a release date AND video here in the U.K.
HOWEVER, Lady Gaga and her “art installation” antics have really left me wondering: what the fuck is she on and where can I get some? Her performances over in the U.K have been quite “special” (especially when she was on Jonathan Ross) and when she is being interviewed she now “plays” a role. I’m still asking myself, what the fuck the entire “teacup thing” was. She is becoming (or maybe she always was) soo fucking full of herself that she is bordering on annoying. I mean to say that NO ONE inspires her? I think, I would have to say that is….. hmmmm…let me see…….. BULLSHIT!
I hope she doesn’t let this entire “fame around the world” get to her skanky little head cos bitch should always remember one thing: Honey, you dry humped Shamu the whale on your first video and there ain’t nothing artsy about that!
