I wish I could honestly say this week has brought us some a-mazing tunes, but seriously it’s been pretty shit. Let’s get the poop-fest going!
She YUCK!
Shakira has just released her 1st single “She Wolf,” from her as yet untitled album, and I wish I could say something positive about this but it’s just very, very, stinky.
Shakira has always been quite annoying really, but with this new single the annoying-ness is on full blast! I find her voice irritating and I just don’t like it. So in reality for me to actually like a Shakira song she would have to….. hmmmm……not be in it!
The song has a disco-y feel to it and she sings/raps on the song. It tries to get funky but let’s face it there is nothing funky about this white girl. Now let’s talk about the single cover, I mean who is this woman? I know it’s not Shakira! It’s like a Britters clone from 2004 or something, I think the main problem with her is that she really tries too hard.
My Rating: 4 limp cocks.
Sasha/ Beyonce has been releasing singles left and right and some of them have been great (“Single Ladies”) some good (“Ego”) and some have been all out YUCK! (“Diva”) She is now releasing the 6th single “Sweet Dreams” and it falls somewhere between great and good.
The song has a very electro-feel to it and I think this it’s pretty different from all of the other singles that have been knocking around the radio. This would have to be Sasha at her most “alternative” and I think this should really be the direction that good old Beyonce should take and leave the hood rat in…. well….. the hood.
Trannies around the world can breathe a sigh of relief cos Miss. Knowles has also released a video that will keep the imitations coming at your local Gay bar for many, many years to come.
My Ratings: 3 and a half stiff and juicy dicks.
Manos Abajo.
Here we have yet another Latin diva trying to make the Spanish thing work for her and whereas Shakira does speak Spanish Nelly does not. You wouldn’t be able to tell from her singing though she sounds very Hispanic which is about the only good thing I can say about this mish-mash of crap-ola.
“Manos Al Aire” is the first single from her first Spanish album “Mi Plan.” I don’t know why she decided to release a Spanish album after the massive success she had with “Loose” cos this song is nowwhere near the brilliance that was “Maneater,” but then again I highly doubt that level of a-mazing-ness will ever happen again. Nelly tries to do different things with her msuic and that is always a good thing but sadly the results are not always very good. Let’s just hope this was a crappy first single and the rest of her album will be listenable cos this ain’t.
My Rating: 4 dysfuntional cocks.
Single Of The Week:
Mary J Brilliant
Mary J. Blige is back with “The One” and she says that she wanted people out there to get to know “Crazy Mary” and if this is what she calls cray she should lose it more often cos this is EPIC!
Now people are going arond hating on our girl Mary cos she’s decided to use auto tune on this track and yes, it’s true that she does use more than her fair share of the “devil’s instrument” but I think that it doesn’t distract from the fact the song itself is just the best thing that Mary has done since “Fine.”
I LOVE this and think you should to! Give it a lsiten and tell me if ya don’t agree.
Mary J. Blige feat. Drake – “The One”
