In the late 80′s as a pre-teen growing in up in Dallas, Texas, listening to anything Gay was something very difficult to do. I mean I really could not identify with some of the crap that was on the radio at the time. (Hello! Bon Jovi? I think not!) So, what was a Gay to do? Well, if you were like me you seek shelter in the arms of 80′s pop sluts that would put a whole lotta whore into a song and POOF! I give you SONGS TO WHORE BY……
Today we take a look at Martika. (She was the Christina Augilera of the late 80′s). Playing 2nd best to Debbie Gibson (The Britney of the late 80′s) Martika is best known for her song “Toy Soldiers” and while that song is o.k, there was a true gem on her debut that talked about “swinging on a guys vine” and wanting someone so bad and begging them to tell her what to do!! I mean talk about a freak! The title alone pretty much sets the mood “If You’re Tarzan, I’m Jane.” What a perfect name! Truly a song for a whore in heat. (Which was pretty much the story of my life in my teens) Of course the best part of all of this is the faux-tribal-pop beat and back up male singers chanting “ooga boonga” or some shit like that, yes, all this makes the song an instant classic. A song to whore by.
Listen to “If You’re Tarzan, I’m Jane”: If You’re tarzan, I’m Jane
